Sep 15 2008
How Story keeps us sane
Monday morning—just about any Monday morning, but this one in September 2008 is a prime example of heading into another week of fear and anxiety. At least that is the invitation streaming into my inbox and coming over the news in dramatic announcements and making headlines on the front page of my neighbor’s newspaper—the one I glance at before he picks it up. The markets are falling, banks are bankrupt, there’s been a horrible train wreck in California, and a dog in Arizona dialed 9-1-1 and barked so frantically into the phone that medical help was dispatched and saved its owner’s life. And somehow American politics has turned into “American Idol.”
It takes me a while to notice that the sun is out, the breeze is soft, the late summer flowers still blooming in the yard, and the garden still producing squash and carrots. It takes a few breaths to look up, smile at my beloved, pet the dogs, call the grown kids in LA and Denver, write my niece in Japan—young people venturing into the world, offering their gifts to an uncertain age. In other words, life in the immediate and the moment is still good. And the “goodness,” the “ordinariness,” the “stability” of anything is impermanent. How do I make story out of this?
Today I’m looking at three aspects of story:
- Story as meaning-maker,
- Story as pattern keeper/breaker,
- Story as path-finder.
The story of meaning is how we got here, how we have strung life together thus far and arrived at our worldview, our beliefs, explained our life circumstances to ourselves an others. We make the world of our history by the stories we hold onto about who we are and how thing are.
The story of pattern-keeping and pattern breaking is how we stand at the edge of all we know and reinforce the stories that got us here, or challenge them and open ourselves to new possibilities. We make the world of the moment by discerning the values within the stories swirling around us and choosing that to follow.
The story of path-finding is how we dream our ways forward, stories of what if, and wow did you hear about the courage of someone else? We make the world we want first in the stories we share—and then in the creativity with which we face our own choices.
So on this Monday morning, I am looking at the onslaught of meaning-making that streams in through printed and electronic media, looking for patterns to keep, patterns to break, and trying to find a path forward. Here are a few questions that might elicit stories that help:
- Do you remember a childhood moment when being an American (or whatever nationality you are) was significant to you?
- How does that moment live in you now?
- What patterns do you see around you that you cherish and want to keep? What patterns do you want to challenge?
- What or who nourished you today?
Let’s start there—
Tell me that story.
Copyright ©2009 Christina Baldwin. All rights reserved.
Thanks, Christina. My college is currently going through a crush of media attention because of the actions of a left-leaning affiliate professor who made a very poor decision. He assigned his class an essay - to write critically of Sarah Palin - and raised the ire of conservative students who felt he was creating a hostile environment where their views weren’t heard or tolerated.
You ask what patterns we want to challenge. At another point in my life I would’ve jumped into this kind of essay with glee, and might have been one of the loudest voices in the room trying to make my views be heard. I think now that that is counter-productive. What ends up happening is nothing: no one listens, no one learns, nothing changes, and our shrill discourse gets even shriller as the distance between us as brothers & sisters grows ever wider.
My views won’t change, but my willingness to listen thoughtfully — to remember the old quote “You can’t hate someone whose story you know” — needs to change.
Christina,
Thank you for sharing your thoughts…this is the first time I’ve looked at your site, blog, etc. Reading what you have to say reminds me of Clarissa Pinkola Estes, whom I greatly admire as a storyteller (she came to the Dances of Universal Peace and was simply extraordinary!).
I also consider myself a storyteller, yet am perhaps a bit too indulgent in the subject of romance. (Like you, I’ve been writing ever since I popped out of my mother’s womb, and it’s as vital as my next breath.) I invite you to look into my blogs, at the above website address and to make any comments you wish.
Again, thank you for your stories, your heartfelt teachings and your time.
Many Blessings,
Ruthie Suli Urman